Thursday, August 9, 2012

Supernatural Peanut Butter thief


I need to report a crime.

Someone stole my blueberry crisp Clif bar. 

It was next to me on the passenger seat of the JEEP.  I remember opening the wrapper at the intersection about halfway between the YMCA and my residence.  I had maybe a bite or two.  Or Three but I took NO MORE than three bites, of that I’m sure.  

And then I reached across and encountered an empty wrapper.  I know I couldn’t have possibly eaten the whole thing because my stomach was still as empty as the blueberry scented brown clif bar packaging between my fingers.

I worry it's the start of an epidemic.
No, I'm quite serious.

This whole thing follows a very disturbing PB&J incident that had an eerily similar pattern.  I reached for the last bite of peanut butter and jelly sandwich and... the plate was empty.  I was chewing at the time, but again, I was still SOoooo hungry that there's no way that I ate it.

Nope.  
No way.
This was definitely a case of stolen food.

The suspect is likely a blueberry lover, with a known history of Peanut Butter and Jelly thievery.  Suspect is capable of traveling at speeds up to 35 mph.  
And invisible.
but real, before you all start thinking I'm losing it...  I'm not losing it.  I have the empty wrapper and empty stomach to prove...

Just look at the evidence.

The only alternatives to blatant thievery is that I’m so hungry from all this Training that I’ve lost any semblance of sanity regarding food.

But I'd prefer to think that I’m being stalked by an invisible supernatural being who enjoys Clif products and Natural Peanut Butter on whole wheat..

1 comment:

Unknown said...

hahaha the same thing happens here on the west coast...definitely an epedemic!

On a more serious note, just a suggestion, but are you making sure you are eating enough? Training for three disciplines uses A-LOT-O calories. I realized a few times the fun sucking situation was lack of energy due to not fueling enough even though I had eaten close to 3,000 calories already....just a thought :)

Enjoy training and enjoy the race!
You are amazing.