Wednesday, March 13, 2013

The Rules according to Velominati

There are rules to the bike written by The Velominati.

I like them. They're a little like my GBA Rules of Running.

GBA Running Rule #1 - If you're not sure you can run without a top, in just a sports bra, don't.
GBA Running Rule #2 - Don't.Die.Under.A.Car.

So, the rules of GBA go into Triathlon as well...
Tri Rule #1 - Don't.Drown.

Some Velominati High Points include

Rule #5: "Harden the F*ck up"

and

Rule #9:  "If you are out riding in bad weather it means you are a badass. Period."

but my favorite Velominati rule is the one that explains how many bikes one should own, and how to calculate that with advanced math. I love math. It's so pretty. I'm serious. Stop laughing.

Rule #12:  While the minimum number of bikes one should own is three, the correct number is n+1, where n is the number of bikes currently owned. This equation may also be re-written as s-1, where s is the number of bikes owned that would result in separation from your partner.


so, meet "n". I was going to give her some bada** street name that suits her bada** war colors, but to be honest, I finally decided "n" works best. She's a machine, not a flowery creature. She appreciates the simplicity of the letter. It's also the symbol for the element Nitrogen, which is an inert gas. You really need a catalyst to make N do anything exciting, and that's ~hopefully~ where I come into play.  So, I had great plans this week. I was going to go pick her up today, ride tomorrow. Except that I think it will take too much out of me to do that. So... ~sigh~ I'll have to wait. Not that I could have ridden her or anything anyway.... maybe it's better I didn't go pick her up...

so N. Nitrogen. n+1.

You know, on a poetic note, without N, there is no life.

also, as an aside, without N, I'm not sure there are explosives but that's neither here nor there...



1 comment:

Unknown said...

Great bike! Enjoy "N" soon