Wednesday, October 1, 2008

It's an illusion- just so you know

Last night I went to MNO with a MOMS group I'm in...  The shaky economy is really helping my MNO attendance.  really.  Yea, just when I have the least amount of money to spend (H works for Wachovia Bank) I need MNO the most.  

So, given the events of yesterday, I'm starting to feel suspicious about how bad I must normally look on a "work night".  Usually I will show up someplace without a shower, in jeans, a T-shirt and some minimal makeup.  However, last night, I showered, changed, and wore my "bitch shoes".  So... compared to my normal "look" I think I must have looked nice.  No, not bragging about how I look, that sounds weird.  It just... well, the response I got when I walked into The Barrel Thief* was over the top (*if you live in Richmond VA you really need to go check this place out).  I felt like my friends greeted me like a rock star.  Seriously, it was crazy!  And when we had finally settled down they were all staring at me, and one of them blurts out, "How do you do it?".  Um, do what?  "Really, how do you watch after 3 children, babysit for E, go to school, train for a half marathon, and LOOK LIKE THIS!?"  

A MOMENT OF PANIC... look like what?  IS there throw up on the back of my shirt?  Do I have something in my teeth?  Did one of my children do something to me with a crayon?  Am I wearing matching shoes?  Do I have a hole in my shirt?  What do I look like???... OH, wait, you meant that as a compliment.  Ok.  So, how do I do it?

Gee you know.  That is a really good question, how DO I do it?

Naturally, I said something witty and funny about mommy hood (it's my blog after all & my reality, of course I'm going to say that), and the conversation moved on from there.  But later, I thought about it and realized a few truths.

How do I do it?  

Well.  I don't.

The first thing that came to me is that I think the TRAINING is the ANSWER, not the question.  It allows me to blow off stress, have alone time, and to test myself in ways I never thought possible.

The next reality that occurred to me, in my moment of clarity, is that it's an illusion.  I don't have it all together.  Most of the time I feel out of control, like I am just scratching at the surface of "togetherness"... take today for example...  after SS...  

And finally, I think it helps to have a really good fan club.  Surround yourself with people who worship you (ha ha -or at least boost your ego), encourage you and promote your well being & emotional health, and you too can "look like this".


PinkAsphaltMama said...

I'm sensing a theme here. The "Sexy Abs" post, the "MILF" post, and now the other Moms are hot for you?

Open your eyes, girl! You are AMAZING and deserve all the love and admiration you are getting!

Anonymous said...

I am curious, what happened after Stroller Strides??! You are great, girl! I am so proud of all you accomplish - you should be proud too!!