Any sane person would just write the whole thing off & get her a gift certificate to TAPS for her Teacher Appreciation Gift. But no, not me- "That's what you want? OK, if you could just send me a sample, no worries, I'll make you new chair pockets." Um, G? You don't know how to SEW! Did you just offer to sew TWENTY chair pockets? Why yes indeed. On Kentucky Derby weekend? Yes again. Do you HAVE a sewing machine? Actually, no. Are you on crack? (don't answer that question on the internet you fool!)
Ok, I'm off to the "races" here. Gotta go find some scissors, so I can cut this snazzy blue fabric. I'm borrowing a machine later tonight. Oh crap, I forgot to buy pins at the craft store. I'm pretty sure I'm going to need pins. And thread too.... whoops!